• Otilia

How many “Everests” to climb to be worthy of the real one?

It didn’t take long to come to the bitter realization that before the real summit push, there are some other mountains to climb - working at the website for creating awareness around girls empowerment that’s so important to me, talking to my managers to see if it possible to take leave from work for almost two months, designing an efficient training program and following it, selecting the right gear, putting together lists for packing…

Another mountain to climb is people ideas…unfortunately I am no Alex Honnold when it comes to doing this. Truth be told, I’ve never shared with people any idea so extreme as climbing Everest, so it would be unfair to compare their reactions with what I’ve witnessed before in my life. More, most of the people I’ve been talking to are my colleagues and they usually hear me speaking about yield curves and models, so the girls’ empowerment story must have sounded like a full minute of Metallica in the middle of a calming Eine Kleine Nachtmusik concert. Most of the people told me directly that it is madness and I agree with a slight adjustment - it is a deliberate madness and I strongly believe we all have the right to at least a moment of deliberate madness in our life.

In the beginning, I was trying to convince people around me what I am doing is not crazy, on the contrary, it makes a lot of sense. But afterwards I realized that they all have good intentions and I tried to understand their specific perspective. Most of the women were very supportive and their encouragement gave me more energy for the training, and I thank them all from the bottom of my heart. Most of men told me not to do it because it is too tough, and I am going to die…” pure suicide”, to quote. Some of them, good friends of mine, just stopped talking to me and started avoiding me. There were others who encouraged me and told me I have enough determination to succeed in anything I set my mind on. I am grateful to all for sharing their thoughts with me and I do understand that men tend to be protective and they tried to change my mind for my own good.

To my colleagues, I’ve tried to convey a simple message: even if you have a fire burning inside of you day and night, the temperature in your mind can be completely normal. It doesn’t mean I can’t put together financial strategies, or I can’t be trusted to do my work as I’ve been doing it every day for almost twenty years. On the contrary, I am training my determination and I am expanding my horizons…maybe I will be better in everything I do when I come back.

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